Once upon a time, people had job titles like “Graphic Designer” or “Writer.” You knew what they did. They made stuff. Sometimes it even looked good.

Then, something happened.

The tech bros arrived. Startups wanted to disrupt the synergy of cross-platform storytelling ecosystems. Agencies needed to differentiate their verticals. Marketing departments wanted to sound like Burning Man collided with a TED Talk. And suddenly, no one had a normal job title ever again.

We’ve Entered the Nonsense Era

You’re not a social media manager—you’re a “Digital Engagement Strategist.”
You’re not a copywriter—you’re a “Narrative Architect of Emotional Conversions.”
You’re not a graphic designer—you’re a “Visual Alchemist in Experiential Realms.”

Somewhere out there, a 24-year-old intern is updating their LinkedIn to say:

“Junior Brand Whisperer & Meme Futurist at a Decentralized Consciousness Lab.”

And we’re just letting this happen.

A Very Real Hierarchy of Made-Up Creative Titles

If the title sounds like it belongs on a tarot card or a Dungeons & Dragons character sheet, congratulations: you work in the creative industry

But Here’s the Thing… It’s Not Just Pretentious—It’s Strategic

These ridiculous job titles aren’t just the result of too many oat milk lattes in an open-office branding workshop. They’re cover stories, vague, fluffy labels designed to blur job responsibilities and make it harder to know what you’re actually getting into.

You’ll see a listing for:

“Multidisciplinary Creative Catalyst”

What they mean:

• Graphic Designer
• Web Designer
• Motion Designer
• Social Media Manager
• Marketing Strategist
• Copywriter
• Account Manager
• Therapist
• Pizza orderer

All for $40K and no health insurance.

The Career Growth Problem No One Talks About

These vague and inflated job titles don’t just make your day-to-day confusing, they can also hurt your long-term career.

When you go to apply for your next role, your beautifully branded title like “Culture Experience Lead” or “Brand Storyteller and Digital Ecosystem Wrangler” might confuse a recruiter who’s looking for a “Marketing Manager” or “Senior Designer.” Other industries don’t speak your company’s internal language. And they don’t have time to decode your resume.
So even if your work is impressive, your title can:

• Undersell your experience
• Oversell it in weird ways
• Make you look irrelevant, too niche, or just plain confusing

And because it’s hard to benchmark made-up titles against real-world salary data, you also risk getting underpaid or passed over, for someone with a more traditional (i.e., Google-able) job title.

In other words: being the “Creative Solutions Evangelist” might feel fancy until you’re explaining it in a job interview to someone who just wants to know if you can write an email campaign.

The Job Description Said What Now?

You click on a listing that says:

“We’re seeking a Boundaryless Design Sherpa to steward the evolution of our visual identity across the metaverse, print, and emergent brainwave platforms.”

Requirements:

• 8+ years in TikTok strategy
• Proficient in “empathy-forward branding”
• Must enjoy Slack banter
• Salary: $38,000
• Reporting directly to “The Founder’s Vision”

Why Do Companies Do This?

Let’s break it down:

1. Title Inflation Looks Cool on LinkedIn: Calling someone a “Director of Creative Innovation” sounds sexier than “Mid-Level Designer Who Manages the Social Calendar.”

2. Blurred Roles = Fewer Hires: If one person has a title vague enough to cover multiple departments, companies don’t have to hire three specialists.

3. You Can’t Benchmark Compensation If the Title Doesn’t Exist: Try negotiating a raise with a title like “Design Strategist Ninja.” You won’t find that on Glassdoor. Your paycheck will still say exposure.

The Only Job Title That Matters?

Employed.
And accurately represented.

That’s it.

Look, we all love a little creativity. Titles can reflect culture and innovation when used well. But when they’re used to confuse, underpay, or stretch people across six roles? It stops being clever and starts being manipulative.

So whether you’re a Visual Systems Orchestrator or just a tired designer trying to not cry in while redo your eighth PowerPoint of the week, here’s the reminder:

You are not your job title.
Your value isn’t in a buzzword.
And if you ever find yourself needing to translate your job to “Graphic Designer” just to get the next one, you’re not crazy. You’re surviving the system.

Call yourself whatever you want. But make sure someone else, someone with a hiring budget, can understand what you actually do.